As predicted, Greece is hitting the main stage with the economic woes, Taylor discovers a new section of the Patriot Act, and then the boys address General David Patreaus’ felony charges.

Bonus podcast! Taylor and Gunner couldn’t stop talking, so the fans get an extra podcast. No Middle East stuff though – Lets talk about Nazis!. A bit about cops, Elizabeth Warren, and Burger King.

This week we test out whether or not the title matters. Listen to the boys chat about world cup, The Cobra Effect, politicians, legal shenanigans, and of course the corollary poop joke.

How is it that we have prisoners of war when America had so meticulously avoided engaging in such a war? We coined the term ‘Enemy Combatant’ to avoid any legal ramifications for baptizing prisoners with freedom in a dark corner of the basement. If there are POWs in Guantanamo, we might be in a bit of trouble if anyone takes a peak at the Geneva Conventions because it doesn’t allow for stuffing POWs into small boxes or simulating a drowning affect to coerce information.

Where did this word Enemy Combatant come from? What’s the difference between an assassination and a targeting killing? Is there such a thing as terrorists or simply tactics? Has anyone else noticed an unapologetic abuse of words and their meanings so that we can salvage some sense of morality, dignity, or political face?

It may not matter, but I’ve thought about it for a while and if nothing else, perhaps you can linger on the questions to form your own opinion. It could be that Senator Hagel simply slipped and we’ll likely hear from a non-descript lawyer doing some verbal acrobatics to explain how we should interpret it. Either way, it’s curious how words matter so much, yet not at all, all at the same time.

If we rewind about 13 years, a few moments after 19 hijackers turned 4 commercial airliners into Jihadi Guided Missiles, we stood back stupefied and breathless. In less than one day a rogue faction of Muslim wing nuts had successfully shredded America’s sense of comfort and security. Retaliation was for certain, but who do we retaliate against? What do we call this enemy who has no land and no government to support their lawlessness? How would we characterize what would be, in its purist form, an act of vengeance?

Despite George W’s prolific use of the phrase “Global War on Terror,” it’s important to note that the free world was not, in fact, at war. Even though he began awarding soldiers Global War on Terror Service Medals, we were not at war. The words fell from The President’s lips with quiet enthusiasm and we rallied the rest of the free world to join us in arms. Due process was thrown to the wind and the media latched on to the words, repeating them with the irritating regularity akin to Justin Beiber getting tossed in jail. So it shall be: The War on Terror.

In Congressional Legalese, we could anecdotally toss the phrase around but we are not ‘assassinating’ soldiers ‘at war’ in response to a ‘terrorist attack’. This was a ‘Surge of Troops’ executing ‘targeted killings’ of ‘enemy combatants’ to ‘protect our freedom.’

There’s clearly a difference. [Insert uncomfortable silence here].

For those of you doing the math, if you take a suicidal Middle Easterner, inspire him by God to hate America, add in some crazy, then subtract a sovereign land to govern, the answer on the other side of that equation is ‘Enemy Combatant.’ It’s lazy to simplify them into ‘Terrorists’ because there really isn’t such a thing. There’s tactics… but what is a terrorist, really? Ask any Allah abiding Al Qeada enthusiast and they would probably describe you in exactly the same manner. This would assuredly be punctuated with ‘infidel’ and ‘heathen.’

Moving along to the nuances of war, it is by definition a prolonged conflict carried out by states against each other (Reference: The Googles). Although we were quick to rename these brazen soldiers terrorists and rename our troops ‘advisors’, we could not point at a sovereign nation, mobilize a full battalion, and declare all out war.

So what is it then?

A counterstrike? Insurgency? Conflict? Little credence was given to the political, social, or legal implications of launching a Global War on Terror (GWOT). It’s a curious misnomer considering how we meticulously avoided all of the rules that would apply to an act of war.

If in fact it was a war, we would be bound to afore mentioned Geneva Conventions. The GC is a series of treaties and protocols between sovereign states that stem back to the late 1800s and were finalized in the wake of WWI. In short, they set the terms for the humanitarian treatment of war, specifically how to treat prisoners, protections for the wounded, and protections for civilians. In the aftermath of the 9/11 attacks, the War Machine at the Pentagon had little desire to get caught up in the sticky web of international law so it was imperative that we didn’t go to war. The term Enemy Combatant made it that much easier to point to this collective group of anti-American Sand Cowboys who had no base, no insignia, a closet full of toothpaste bombs, and old Soviet Kalashnikovs and tell them that the Geneva Conventions would not apply.

Oh, and please stay to the left for your complementary dose of Freedom.

So, although we continued to capitalize on the inspirational and unifying rhetoric that perpetuated the ‘War on Terror,’ it was determined by the American Government that we were truly not at war because we were not in fact fighting soldiers within a sovereign nation. Much in the same way we were not ‘assassinating’ anybody. When we landed two modified Black Hawk Helicopters inside a Pakistani compound and two Navy Seal teams swept through the black of night, this was simply an exercise ‘to targeted kill’ Osama Bin Laden.

No assassinations here, folks. Move along… (Hey, look over there! Is that Elvis?)

You see, according to former NSA Director Keith Alexander, targeted killings are legitimate acts during times of conflict against enemy combatants within the context of self defense. You may now take a break from reading this to go get some ibuprofen to relieve the brain splitting headache induced by such speech writing dickery. This can also be alleviated by applying copious amounts of Scotch to your daily news reading regimen.

Never mind that some people see it differently – academics such as Gregory Johnsen and Charles Schmitz, twenty-six members of Congress, some media sources (Jeremy Scahill, James Traub), some human rights groups and an ex-CIA station chief from Islamabad (Robert Grenier), who have criticized targeted killings as similar to assassinations or extrajudicial killings – this simply can’t be. That would be illegal within the United States and under international law.

Will clever word play and elegant political jargon ever justify the things we do?

Who’s to say for certain? But consider yourself briefed.

- Spy Guy